*If I ran the universe, working out would make you smell fresh and clean. No- like roses.
Sitting on the couch watching "Plastic Surgery Nightmares" and eating Cheetos all day would make you smell like a goat.
*I just watched my husband take off his socks and put them back in his drawer.
I asked, "What are you doing?"
With a "busted" look on his face he answered, "Noth.. nothing."
He took off his pants and started folding them.
"What are you doing with your pants". I didn't really ask. It was an accusation.
"Just putting my clothes away." He was nervous.
"You're afraid to put clothes in the dirty pile aren't you? Are my laundry skills that bad?"
*I have a new goal: Shorten my laundry cycle. From drawer to body to hamper and back to drawer in under 2 weeks.
AM I aiming too high?
*New Moon is going to be better than Twilight.
*I'm hoping my friend's husband is stuck ay work so I don't have to admit I'd rather have a tooth pulled than go running.
*If I ran the universe, bearing children would be slimming,
nagging would sound like opera,
paying bills would be as relaxing as a massage,
Single women would be frumpy and saggy
And married women would be confident and well put together.
